I guess I should just start at the beginning, as all epic tales tend to do. I came into existence on a chilly June evening when some strange person who'd had a ridiculous amount of coffee couldn't sit still during dinner. He was hanging out with a friend of his and from what I could gather they tend to hang out with a third person - another "Ian". Thus, my name was bestowed upon me. It would seem that this other Ian had gone away on a journey and had left the two of them behind. I felt kind of sad for them, really. They had been abandoned...and I was starting to be nervous that I was going to likewise be abandoned! I had this feeling of dread that I was just going to be thrown away and left to watch the world decompose around me. I had no idea what would await me when I was picked up and taken outside of the only place I had ever known to exist.
The guy decided, I think on a whim, that he was going to take me with him. I didn't know what nefarious deed he had planned on but as least I wasn't alone! He tried to get the girl to laugh by pretending I was talking to her...I couldn't tell if she was genuinely amused or not. He put me in his mode of transportation (I think it's called a "car") and we started on our own journey. I'm a cup, so I can't see a thing out of the windows. All I could see was blue. He also played what I have since learned is called "music" at a terrifying level. My ability to hear has since recovered, so at least there's that. After what seemed to be hours and hours, we arrived at our destination. The guy picks me up and shows the girl that I still, in fact, exist. She implored him to take me with them but he refused. He actually tried to just leave me on her car as a victim of whatever slight breeze or stray creature might come my way. I, again, was exceedingly nervous. The girl took pity on me and put me inside her car for safekeeping as they went to the next restaurant.
Now, it was dark. I couldn't see anything. I heard noises. I knew I was safe inside the girl's car but they had left me by myself in this strange new part of the world. I had a lot of time to think about what I wanted in this life. What did I like? What did I want to do? What could a styrofoam cup actually accomplish? I became quite the philosopher in that time. That's when I decided to share my story with as many people as possible! Suddenly, the guy and girl showed back up! I stopped pondering the dilemma that was my position as a formerly inanimate object who wanted to change the world for the better. The girl handed me back to the guy and they parted ways.
The guy, who I have since found out is named "Jon", took me back to the apartment that he shares with the other Ian. He told me I could stick around for a while (at least until the original Ian returned from his travels) but that I should think about finding a job. It's the first step in discovering my identity, he said. He gave me a wonderful place to sleep for the night and that's where I am currently. I think there will be little trips in the next few days, so please watch this spot. I am so excited to learn and share!
To end my inaugural blog post, I just want to say thank you. Thank you to Jon for creating me. Thank you to the girl for deciding that I mattered. Lastly, thank YOU for going on this exciting journey with me! I'm sure it will prove to be an interesting one.
Oh! One more thing...make sure to follow me on Instagram! My handle is @styrofoam_ian!
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| Me in my nice, warm bed! I could get used to this... |
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